Becoming Jane: the Vignettes
by Icha
Summary: Scenes of Becoming Jane. Can’t stop loving it! Chapter 13: Meeting Mrs. Radcliffe. For those who have yet to see the movie: SPOILERS ahead.
1. Reading: Interrupted

**Becoming Jane: the Vignettes**

**By Icha**

**Rated: T**

_Summary: Drabbles of Becoming Jane. Can't stop loving it! Thanks to Rachel Kingston for the __wonderful and faithful beta! For those who have yet seen the movie: SPOILERS ahead. But I suggest you to still watch it; it is most definitely worth it! And thanks for the read and reviews!_

**Chapter 1. Reading: Interrupted **

The door opened abruptly as she was reading her _Advice from a Young Lady_ for Cassandra. All eyes automatically fixated on a young lad who entered the room with an air of arrogance not unlike the manners of most wealthy Londoners. Despite his highly discourteous entrance, he was so disturbingly handsome that Jane Austen felt her heart skip a beat. To her relief, Mr. Lefroy senior cleared his throat and said,

'Friends, may I introduce my youngest nephew, Mr. Thomas Lefroy. Just arriving from London.'

The young man, rather indifferently, swept his stare over the entire room, catching sight of a girl with dark tresses and dark eyes who was standing prominent, holding a stack of paper. _Lovely_, Tom Lefroy thought idly as he sat by the window sill, aspiring to listen to her reading. Yet, as he found that her reading was 'juvenile' to his 'metropolitan' taste, he began to convince himself of his inevitable boredom in the prolonged company of this country girl.

He could not be more mistaken.

_Author's note:_

_Okay. First meeting of Jane and Tom. I personally love this scene, as it showed the snobbish Tom Lefroy who very much disliked the idea of 'vacation' in the country. So, please review? Thanks!_


	2. A Walk in the Forest

**Becoming Jane: the Vignettes**

**By Icha**

**Rated: T**

_Summary: Drabbles of Becoming Jane. Can't stop loving it! Thanks to Rachel Kingston for the __wonderful and faithful beta! For those who have yet seen the movie: SPOILERS ahead. But I suggest you to still watch it; it is most definitely worth it! And thanks for the read and reviews!_

**Chapter 2. A Walk in the Forest**

'Miss! Er… Miss! Miss!... er…'

She chose to ignore him, but the insolent young lad kept striding towards her. To his misfortune, he took the wrong step and fell unceremoniously into a ditch. Attempting to hide her grins, but to no avail, Jane Austen resumed walking.

'Miss! Er…Miss…' he was persistent. 'Miss…er…'

'Austen!' Jane finally yelled, hoping that he would leave her alone.

'Ah! Er… Mr. Lefroy,' he regained his composure and hastily introduced himself. 'Yes I…. know who you are,' Jane bluntly declared, 'But I am alone.' She rejected his company and swiftly continued along her path. He hurriedly chased her. 'Come on! What rules of conduct are there to define this rural situation? We have been introduced, have we not?'

This statement overwhelmed her, for Jane turned in annoyance. 'What value is there in an introduction when you cannot even remember my name?' She faced the young lad with limited attempt to conceal her disfavour. 'Indeed, you were barely awake in my presence.'

Sensing her hostility, Tom Lefroy refrained from offering a riposte. Yet, as he turned away to leave, she delivered.

'These scruples must be very simple for a gentleman with such elevated air as yours, but I did not invent these rules…' She made a deliberate, accentuated curtsey. 'I am merely obliged to obey them.'

He finally understood the reason behind her _belligerence_. 'Ah…I see. We are talking of your reading?'

Bad move for him, as he suddenly found himself immersed in heated discussion about topics such as prose, reading and female ability for critical thinking. Jane ended the discussion by aggressively suggesting he explore the library for the natural history of Selbourne Wood in Hampshire (in a very unlikely case that he decided to explore the wood again), and turned to make leave.

'You're sure I have not offended you?' he still enquired, despite obvious evidence to the contrary.

'No, not at all!' she called, wondering how a man could be so blind. She strode away, leaving him lost in the wood; she clearly disliked him enough to abstain from helping him find his way. _No Sire, such an impertinent rogue deserves to be left alone in the forest!_

She did not realize then that she would deeply treasure those 'irritating' moments for all her years to come.

_Author's note:_

_This scene is sooo funny, I really love listening to the particular track of the soundtrack. Jane was so annoyed, and Tom was trying to comprehend the 'where did I go wrong' thing. So, what do you think?_


	3. First Ball

**Becoming Jane: the Vignettes**

**By Icha**

**Rated: T**

_Summary: Drabbles of Becoming Jane. Can't stop loving it! Thanks to Rachel Kingston for the __wonderful and faithful beta! For those who have yet seen the movie: SPOILERS ahead. But I suggest you to still watch it; it is most definitely worth it! And thanks for the read and reviews!_

**Chapter 3. First Ball**

The Basingstoke Assembly was simply another ball for her; another social gathering she was obliged to attend. It was not that she despised to dance; she had actually enjoyed the activity on several occasions. She just dreaded the ball tonight for Mr. Wisley would surely be there. Jane imagined him standing next to Her Grouchiness, Lady Gresham, and upon the Ladyship's permit, he would be sure to ask her to dance. Jane was not in the least bit excited by this prospect.

Jane was standing to the side of the ballroom with her cousin, Eliza De Feullide, when Henry Austen dashingly approached them and asked for Eliza to dance with him. _Hah! Now I knew why he was like a peacock tonight! _She looked at Eliza and realised that she, too, was excessively glowing at the invitation from Henry. _Upon my words… are they…?_

She had no time to ponder her thoughts further, for the very Mr. Wisley was drawing near to ask her for the next dance. She almost squeaked her refusal, but upon her mother's glare she swallowed her dissent and let him lead her to the dance floor.

The music was merry and everyone seemed to be very happy. She sensed Mr. Wisley's discomfort and her sympathy flowed. She decided to dismiss her pride and let him take control …only to promptly receive a hard, painful step on her foot.

_Oww!_ She almost shrieked in pain when she instinctively glanced toward the balcony above and detected none other than Thomas Lefroy smirking at her pain and misfortune. A surge of anger emerged from within, causing her to forget her physical discomfort. She stared at the insolent Mr. Lefroy directly in the eye and concluded in her mind that she would continue the dance, no matter what. She bit her lips in sheer determination._ I will not stop. Especially not when this dashing, yet intensely annoying rogue, is watching me from above!_

She listlessly accepted Mr. Wisley's pathetic and continuous apologies…._Well, it is not his fault that he is clumsy, eh? At least, he is being honest…_ However, she could not deny that she was too glad when the particular round was over, for she could dash away to find her brother and her cousin.

Both Henry and Eliza were both enjoying themselves up on the balcony, completely ignorant of her poor dancing partner and her miserable foot. Henry acknowledged her presence and Eliza asked, 'What do you make of Mr. Lefroy?', upon which Jane snorted and replied, 'Huh, we're honoured by his presence. Or more likely, he is honoured by our presence. Such a rude, insolent person; he thinks himself better than the rest of us!'

'Jane…' Henry interrupted with a warning tone.

'And how rude he has been throughout the entire ball! When there are so many young women without dance partners and yet he refuses to oblige, insisting on just standing and watching!' She noticed her brother's attempt to speak, but she could not stop her vehement talk. 'Pray, from which part of Ireland did he come?'

'Limerick, Miss Austen,' a voice so unlike Henry's spoke from behind her. She turned around and gasped to find Tom Lefroy standing still, clearly amused by her scolding rave. She desperately tried to find an intelligible repartee, but he took the opportunity and asked her to accompany him to dance. Him! Wanting to dance with her! And so very unlike her… she consented.

Hence, Jane Austen found herself dancing the quick steps with Thomas Lefroy, constantly exchanging banters and innuendos with this intriguing young man. She felt her displeasure towards him increase with every step, despite his handsome countenance, lovely blue eyes and graceful ability to dance. What she did not realise though, was that her infinite 'displeasure' still allowed her the time for two dances in his company, and all under the knowing eyes of all who knew her .

Her mother was naturally the first to comment. 'You danced two sessions with him, Jane. He must have grown in you.'

'Careful, Jane,' Henry teased her. 'Tom is my friend, and from our time spent in London, I happen to know that he is famous for his irresistible charm and extensive experience. Indeed, Tom Lefroy is a man of reputation!'

She snorted and stepped into the carriage. 'Presumably as the most disagreeable, insolent, arrogant, imprudent, insufferable, impertinent of men!'_ That's it then! No more dancing with Mr. Lefroy!_

A week later, she found herself wishing that she could take those words back.

_Author's note:_

_Tom's smirk and witty grins were priceless here! And I felt my toes also hurt when Jane tried to conceal her pain. Poor girl…_


	4. A Game of Cricket

**Becoming Jane: the Vignettes**

**By Icha**

**Rated: T**

_Summary: Scenes of Becoming Jane. Can't stop loving it! Thanks to Rachel Kingston for the __wonderful and faithful beta! For those who have yet seen the movie: SPOILERS ahead. But I suggest you to still watch it; it is most definitely worth it! And thanks for the read and reviews!_

**Chapter 4. A Game of Cricket**

'Alright, who's next?!'

They were loosing. John Warren could not perform half what they required to win the game. Losing her patience, Jane Austen grabbed the bat and walked towards the gentlemen. She ignored the hush and giggles of the ladies and dismissed the look of disbelief from the gentlemen. She glanced at the arrogant Mr. Lefroy and bit her lips. _He thinks of me as incapable._ She adjusted her stance in preparation and smirked. _I'm afraid you will be disappointed, Mr. Lefroy!_

Tom Lefroy could not believe what he was seeing. This girl, oh what a character, had attempted an awful reading, had danced with a man incapable of dancing and now this?! _This day is just getting better and better…_ He frowned and, with little attempt to hide his utter amusement at this bewildering situation, went to his post in preparation to bowl. He walked back to allow some distance for approach and then stopped, re-evaluated and walked back further. His competitive streak was firing within him. _Why is she aggravating me so…._He ran with the ball and upon release, swung the ball with gentle delivery. After all, she was just an incompetent girl; surely she could not hit the ball?

To his astonishment, the ball was hit with perfect accuracy and flew across the hill towards the forest. He was agape as his friends tried to catch the ball; meanwhile the girl he had judged 'incompetent' ran back and forth the posts and won the game.

Everyone cheered her as she confidently approached the lads. 'Interesting game, is it not?' she smirked as brother Henry laughed and hugged her. Catching his breath after a failed attempt to save his team, Tom Lefroy swore inwardly. Yet, he could not disengage his attention from this country girl; a flux of admiration and curiosity flowed through him. _She's definitely of a different ilk, this one._

Inexplicably, he longed for his next encounter with her.

_Author's note:_

_Another of my favourite scenes! The determined look of Jane when she grabbed the bat and the incredulous look from Tom… are just priceless! And that she managed to save her team! Gosh!_

_And anyone disagree that the real Jane Austen would not do cricket, one will just have to read Pride and Prejudice when Elizabeth Bennet crossed the country just to visit her ill sister. Or better: Northanger Abbey, for Catherine Morland much preferred cricket and baseball to watering the roses._


	5. Experience is Vital

**Becoming Jane: the Vignettes**

**By Icha**

**Rated: T**

_Summary: Drabbles of Becoming Jane. Can't stop loving it! Thanks to Rachel Kingston for the faithful beta! __Chapter 5: Banters between Jane and Tom in the library. For those who have yet seen the movie: SPOILERS ahead. But I suggest you to watch it still, it worth it! And thanks for the read and reviews!_

**Chapter 5. Experience is Vital**

She was overwhelmed; she had just this morning seen a very naked Mr Lefroy at the lake.

Well, thank goodness, she only caught the rear side of his nakedness. But, still she could not rid her mind of this inappropriate image. She therefore took to wandering around Mrs. Lefroy's library, aspiring to look for something more interesting than this improper image of Tom Lefroy.

Yet, upon climbing a wooden ladder to browse the selection of books in the library, she heard not too subtle a chuckle from behind the bookshelf. Surreptitiously, she peered behind the books…… only to discover the very person she was desperately trying to eliminate from her thoughts… reading a book with noticeable intensity.

_Disaster! _She was instantly thinking of the possible methods to escape this dire situation. Gingerly, she stepped down the ladder. Her heart stopped momentarily as the ladder squeaked, informing the room and its occupant of her presence. She gasped and in hast, ran down the ladder in an attempt to leave the room…..

..…which brought her in direct eye contact with the dashingly insolent Tom Lefroy himself. She cried inwardly for escape.

'Miss Austen,' he leered as he bowed.

'Mr. Lefroy…' she tentatively uttered. To her dismay, this interaction was unavoidable. She glanced at the book in his hand and could not resist the temptation to ask '… in reading?'

Evidently ignorant of propriety, he opened the book of natural history. 'I have been following your advice, Miss Austen. But I have to say that this book is rather……disturbing.'

'Disturbing?' she could not believe his comment.

Sensing her consternation, he responded 'Yes. Take this for example.' He then began to read a passage about the reproduction of insects. Jane felt her whole internal balance shift; she blushed in response to the sound of his voice and what he was reading. Ignoring her obvious discomfort, he resumed, '_…until the female utters –_'

And he stopped. He scrutinized the passage. Almost inaudibly, Jane whispered, 'Yes?'

He glanced up. His piercing blue eyes sent her a cryptic message as he continued, _'…the female utters a loud, piercing cry of ecstasy.'_

Her blushing was uncontrollable now. _Why is he having this effect on me?_

He smirked as he closed the book. Boldly but with a tone of mischievousness, he asked, 'Tell me Miss Austen; is this conduct commonplace in the natural history of Hampshire?'

She murmured some unintelligible words, upon which he chuckled. 'Your ignorance is understandable,' he continued to tease her, '– for you lack… shall we say… experience?' He motioned to the other side of the bookshelf and spoke seriously, 'If you wish to practice the art of fiction, to be the equal of a masculine author, experience is vital.'

That was far too imprudent for Jane not to riposte. 'And what qualifies you to offer such advice?'

'Naturally,' he gloated. 'I have much more experience than you.'

She snorted. 'Huh! A great deal of it, I gather!'

Tom did not withdraw his attack. 'Enough to know that your horizons must be….…widened.'

'And how shall I do that, in your opinion?' retorted Jane.

Ah, such a daring prompt from the lady. Here, this alluring lad started to unmask his intentions by stating that the young lady should become more acquainted with a young man of significant experience.

Jane of course disagreed. She glided, bemused, to the other side of the bookshelf and then upon coming to her senses, retorted, 'A very dangerous young man, one who's no doubt infects the hearts of many a young –' she stopped dead in front of Tom who was sharing her confined space. Her voice wavered '– women…with the soft corrupt…'

As Jane struggled to find her words to defect his, Tom took a book from the shelf and gave it to her.

'Read this, and you'll understand' he declared. With that, he sniffed and left the room with his debonair manner.

Jane Austen tried to discharge the scarlet hue on her face as she observed the 'History of Tom Jones' lay in her hands. She admitted defeat in this round of 'discussion' with Tom Lefroy. Well, she would let him win no more, for she was determined to finish the book at the earliest possible opportunity.

She did not expect, however, that the rather erotic book would cause her restless nights afterwards; that as she read through the lines, she would imagine Tom's sultry voice reading for her.

_Author's note:_

_Ahhh!!! Those banters! One of the best banters in drama movie – particularly period drama movie. Just excellent! And Tom's voice interlacing with Jane's as she read the lines… gosh! Anne Hathaway and James McAvoy really created such chemistry! (I've said that, and I shall do so again)._


	6. Miscalculated Move

**Becoming Jane: the Vignettes**

**By Icha**

**Rated: T**

_Summary: Drabbles of Becoming Jane. Can't stop loving it! Thanks to Rachel Kingston for the faithful beta! Chapter 6: Boxing at the __Laverton Fair. For those who have yet seen the movie: SPOILERS ahead. But I suggest you to watch it still, it worth it! And thanks for the read and reviews!_

**Chapter 6. Miscalculated Move**

The day he chose to take Miss Austen to Laverton Fair was a Sunday. The very obscure notion of asking her to travel so far from Steventon had been generated with little hope of her acceptance. To his surprise, the invitation was accepted with enthusiasm. Of course, the tactic of offering such invitation when they were discussing 'Tom Jones' may have led to her perception that the trip was highly necessary to continue their stimulating discussion on this topic. Furthermore, what better situation could offer such opportunity than a trip together to Laverton? However, convention required their journey to be accompanied by Henry Austen, Eliza De Feullide and the mildly irritating Lucy Lefroy.

Still, Tom Lefroy thought that he knew better. From Jane's most cheerful smile when he smiled at her. From the way she expressed her gratitude when he brought her drinks and light meal. From her laughter and the occasional effort she made to touch his arm conveying her excitement. He knew that she had not come to Laverton out of boredom and for the purpose of resuming their Tom Jones discussion; she had come because, unknowingly, she wanted to spend more time with him. This knowledge had been his exact motive for taking her here, away from her natural surroundings.

And she did not mind. She let him take lead, showing her the magnificent world of gypsies, fire-eaters and even prostitutes; she thought the experience fascinating. Jane was in very high spirit that afternoon and this ignited his admiration towards her. It also evoked his desires to protect her; he wanted her to have the best.

'Lefroy!' Henry's call returned him to reality, 'It's getting dark here, we should return soon!' Tom looked to see Jane examining a collection of straw bonnets with Lucy.

'Aye, aye!' Tom was not so pleased to be reminded of time. Had he all the time in the world, he just wanted to spend it alone with Jane. This thought instantly surprised him; he was still trying to adjust to these new, overpowering emotions he was feeling for the lively Miss Austen. 'Another turn and we will meet you at the carriage park' he reluctantly stated. And hence, as Henry strode away with Eliza, Tom beckoned Jane and led her to the last part of Laverton they had yet explored, the amusement zone.

Boxing zone seemed a more appropriate term. He found a corner bustling with people, all yelling and shouting. He guided Jane cautiously yet calmly thitherwards the zone.

The feisty Miss Austen did not, of course, hesitate in asking, 'So, this is your idea of amusement, Mr. Lefroy? I understand that in London it is quite the activity to be partaking in.'

'Yes…actually –' Tom was distracted from amiably answering by the poor performance of the boxers. He snorted. 'Huh! That's not a good move at all!' A boxer was receiving multiple punches from his opponent as they approached the scene. 'Huh! Such a poor strike!' Another blow from the large-framed opponent, and his victim was visibly shaking. _How come this weak man joined such a game?!_

Without warning, Tom impulsively took off his hat and dismantled his overcoat. Hastily, along with his baton, he gave them to a bewildered Jane. 'Hold this!' he commanded as he strode towards the boxing arena. Ignoring Jane's baffled facial expression, Tom launched a very hard punch in the direction of the tall boxer, effectively preventing him from creaming his current victim into mash potato.

'You better show a better performance, Sir!' Tom Lefroy loosened his white shirt and cravat as he spoke. 'For you are going to face me instead!' He then instinctively aimed the cravat at Jane, who caught it with utmost anxiety.

Enraged by the sudden intervention, the tall boxer roared and answered Tom's challenge. Without boxing gloves, both men directed hard jabs and punches to each adversary, eager to knock the rival out immediately to win the round. One cut, two cuts…Tom found himself winning, until his opponent launched a very hard punch to his jaw and sent him soaring towards the perimeter.

Jane instantly came to his rescue, but not without shouting, 'Tom, please stop! Stop right now!' – A very sincere demand of which he naturally neglected. Instead, he stabilised and thrust himself back into the arena.

One upper cut, two jabs… . _I might win after all_. And then suddenly,

'Tom!'

_That scream!_ Was it Jane's voice? He was unsure; the crowds were too noisy. But…what if it was her? _ What if she's hurt?_

A sharp feeling of concern passed through him. Tom turned to see if Jane was alright. And thus, received one of the most deadly blows in his life; effectively knocking him out of the arena. He lost consciousness for a few seconds as his body slammed hard to the ground. He heard the muffled voices of people…. so far away. He half-consciously heard of Henry and Eliza speaking… of Jane chided Lucy… and he opened his eyes.

His first visual image was of Jane, kneeling down next to him; the utmost concern and apprehension unequivocal in her dark eyes.

'Mr. Lefroy! Mr. Lefroy! Are you alright?' Her voice was so fearful for his safety; he felt warmth encompassing his heart.

He coughed and smiled, despite the taste of blood in his mouth. 'I'm…fine…' He attempted to stand and was very delighted to receive her wholehearted assistance. 'Thank you…' he managed.

'Why did you do that?' she questioned in utter dismay.

'Why?' he repeated, spluttering blood from his mouth. He paused, unsure how to deliver an answer. _Was it to impress her? _Finally, the scoundrel in him emerged, 'I just thought it would be fun,' he shrugged.

'Fun?!' she retorted with disbelief. 'I….assumed it was for your sense of justice.…'

He began to understand, she thought that he had intervened to help the helpless boxer. He chuckled. 'Justice? Miss Austen, I am a lawyer. Justice has nothing to do with law.'

Alarm as apparent as daylight dawned on her. 'Surely you do not believe that Mr Lefroy…'

Her complete innocence struck him. He was going to try justifying his opinion but thought better of it. Hence, he profoundly stated 'I believe what I must.'

And in an instant, he knew that he had disappointed her. He realised that her strong views, although naive in their structure, would cause Jane Austen to defy such a response. Nay… she would firmly stand by her heartfelt beliefs, ignoring the expectations and dictations of society. She would never bow to convention. And he, no matter mischievous his daily behaviours seemed, was her opposite. With utmost fear and regret he realised that his position _**required **_him to submit to society and the rules imposed. This society he despised so intensely. At that moment, the reality struck him: his duty and obedience to convention might be the greatest difference between him and his Jane Austen.

He felt that she was disappointed in him and he could not withstand it any further. Hastily, he rose. 'I beg your leave.'

She barely nodded her consent as he collected his clothes, rose and marched to a nearby fountain to clean himself. Splashing cold water over his bloody face, he was reprimanding himself for his effortless answers and lack of affection. _Why was he not more eloquent? Why did he always feel the need to be ostentatious? _He simply wanted to be honest with her and to share his deeper self; a part of him usually strictly concealed from view. He was beginning to understand that these feelings for Miss Austen were something quite unlike anything he had ever experienced before, and he was not sure he was ready for it.

He finished cleaning his face, attempting to wipe it with his shirt. A sound from behind startled him but he did not turn. 'Take this' said the familiar voice in a somewhat soft tone. To his surprise, Jane's voice was not angry at all. Dismay, maybe, but not anger.

Tom turned to find Jane offering him her handkerchief. Perplexed, he took her scented cloth and wiped his face. _Ah…Lily of the Valley, _he thought_, so very Jane. _Her sweet fragrance lingered in the air, comforting him instantly. He uncomfortably returned her handkerchief and she handed him his cravat, along with his other clothes to wear.

'Thank you…' was the only word he could muster as he put on his clothes. He was spellbound by her presence. 'I…'

'Just be careful next time,' she interrupted. 'He could have caused you considerable damage. If you are hurt, the people who care for you will be downhearted.' Her dark eyes spoke a million words. 'We must go. The others are waiting.'

With that, she turned and walked away from him. He was eager to stop her and apologize for his recklessness, but instead found himself standing in a haze of bewilderment and awe. His eyes followed with fascination this young lady who had intrigued him more than any women had ever before. His heart sank with this revelation.

Oh, how he desired to tell her how his reputation as a careless rake had been caused by his ardent will to forget all of his family problems? That he had always so desperately wanted to escape from reality…until he met her? That for the first time in his life he was ready to be responsible, to provide comfort and joy, and to protect a person outside his family circle. He knew that he wanted this person to be Jane. Oh…how he craved to tell her so.

He realized that he had fallen in love with her. It was undisputable. _Does she feel the same? _The hardest question of all was suffocating his thoughts – How could he ask her to be his knowing that the entire world would stand against them?

Tom Lefroy was helpless and without answers. He had, however, learned two precious things that afternoon. One, never to antagonise the beliefs of Jane Austen; she would not give in.

Two, that he loved her more than anything in his world. And he could not find the courage to tell her.

-TBC-

_Author's note:_

_Okay, I made up several things here. The last part, particularly, for the movie cut after Tom dismissed himself. Also, I took the liberty to assume that Tom's distraction was not just because Lucy shouted at him, but because he was afraid of Jane's safety. Feel free to give constructive opinions, though!_

_Re: lily of the valley, Rachel and I believe that JA would fancy LoV, for this fragrance was renowned in the mid 18__th__ century. This is the depiction of lily of the valley perfume from The Floris London: '__Fresh, green and very feminine, a stunning interpretation of this classic floral fragrance, it epitomises Spring. Lily of the Valley will appeal to women who are free-spirited and at ease with nature, who will love it for its sweet, dewy moments. The fragrance will transcend age, appealing to the youthful in mind rather than of age. The first Floris Lily of the Valley fragrance dates from the mid-18th century.'_


	7. Nowhere to be Found

**Becoming Jane: the Vignettes**

**By Icha**

**Rated: T**

_Summary: Drabbles of Becoming Jane. Can't stop loving it! Thanks to Rachel Kingston for the faithful beta! Chapter 7: Jane looks for Tom in the ball room. For those who have yet __to see the movie: SPOILERS ahead. But I suggest you to watch it still, it worth it! And thanks for the read and reviews!_

**Chapter 7. Nowhere to be ****found**

She caught a glimpse of him watching her from the window. She glanced up cautiously, but he was gone. The empty window of Lady Gresham's manor stared back at her. Jane Austen was sure that Tom Lefroy was there just a moment ago. Or, was he?

He had not contacted her since their trip to Laverton last Sunday; four days had passed. Lucy had informed her, in her uniformly irritating manner, that Tom had been busy hunting in the countryside with Mr. Lefroy senior. _Hunting for four days?_ That was utterly unlike him, given that Tom almost injured his uncle during his introduction to fire-arm handling in Ashe. Jane had been made aware of this incident during the Laverton trip as Tom had narrated the embarrassing episode. The outcome of the blunder had been a forceful suggestion from Mr. Lefroy to 'have a walk in Selbourne Wood'; ultimately leading to Tom's first real encounter with Jane Austen. Upon mentally recalling his story, Jane's humour would have been restored had she not also remembered that Tom was not an outdoors creature. The likelihood of him spending four days hunting in the forest was therefore very improbable.

_He __must be avoiding me, _Jane concluded bitterly as she stepped down from the carriage. _But, there is surely some rational explanation. He is here, I am sure. He saw me, I am certain. _She eagerly followed the elegant Eliza De Feullide and her brother Henry into the Manor, where she met Lady Gresham at the top of the stairway. Ignoring Her Ladyship's questioning glare, Jane Austen entered the grand ballroom; her eyes fully engaged in searching for the presence of one person….Mr. Tom Lefroy.

She forced a cheerful smile to some of her female acquaintances but her eyes did not divert from her concentrated search. With time, her heart started to sink. _He is not here… He is indeed avoiding me…_

Her mind wandered as she recalled the contents of a letter from her dear sister. Cassandra had warned her of the dangers in letting such a rogue lure her precious heart into 'breaking the proprieties and conventions of the society' as her sister had said in her letter. Cousin Eliza had been even more stringent in reprimanding her. Only this afternoon, as they were preparing for the ball, Eliza had expressed her deep concern over Jane's recent behaviours. She was rigidly opposed to the notion that Jane had befriended a poor Irish rake such as Lefroy instead of a wealthy gentleman. When Jane dared to remind Eliza that Henry might have been acquainting Eliza for money, the ravishingly beautiful countess just held her head high and firmly stated, 'Men do. And I am a sensible woman.' Eliza continued to add that 'Mr Lefroy will soon be back in London where he can do no more damage.' This statement had sparked Jane's realisation that the termination of Tom's stay in Hampshire would naturally mean the reestablishment of his previous exploits in London; namely prostitution, drinking and boxing.

It was Jane's admiring love for Eliza that had numbed her tongue that afternoon. Thus, instead of riposting her cousin, she continued brushing her lavish dark hair, dreaming of the next chance she may have to converse with the Irish rogue. _Would it be at the party this evening? _She had sincerely hoped it would

Yet, back to reality, Jane's search had been to no avail; she had not glimpsed one sight of his dark hair, his dashing style or his charming smile. She instantly doubted her sighting of him in the window. _Did my mind see only what it wanted to see?_

Summoning her positive thoughts, she decided to circle the room once more to find Tom. The ball was to begin soon and she would not want to dance at all without Tom Lefroy as her partner. _Especially not with…Mr. Wisley._

Jane felt her heartbeat cease momentarily. Stood directly in front of her was Mr. Wisley, occupying his usual elusive and fidgety mode. The heir of Lady Gresham smiled at Jane nervously as he asked, 'Would you do me the honour of the first dance, Miss Austen?'

Jane was bewildered. She had refused Mr. Wisley's marriage proposal two days earlier, when, in the very unlikely event, he and Lady Gresham had visited her home. She was sure that she had been unequivocal in her refusal. Yet, here he was expressing his desire to dance with her as if her rejection did nothing but elevate his hope.

Her mind and her heart adamantly told her that she did not wish to dance with anyone but Tom Lefroy. Yet, inexplicably, she found herself in the hand of Mr. Wisley. As she moved to position herself in preparation to dance, her hope to catch any glimpse of Mr. Lefroy remained relentless. Jane's eyes deceived her; she witnessed no hint of his presence and so reluctantly began to dance with Mr. Wisley. As the music flowed and the couples danced, Jane Austen felt her joy fading and all of her hopes and desires painfully withering.

_Author's note:_

_I could see clearly Jane __so desperately seeking for Tom that evening. It was clear in her eyes and entire body language that she wished to see him so much. Yet she found Wisley instead. My heart sank with her…_

_Thanks for the read and review!  
_


	8. Dance of the Heart

**Becoming Jane: the Vignettes**

**By Icha**

**Rated: T**

_Summary: Drabbles of Becoming Jane. Can't stop loving it! Thanks to Rachel Kingston for the faithful beta! Chapter __8: Tom takes Jane by surprise during the second ball. For those who have yet to see the movie: SPOILERS ahead. But I suggest you to watch it still, it worth it! And thanks for the read and reviews!_

**Chapter 8. Dance of**** the Heart**

The soulful music was too beautiful to ignore, too romantic not to enjoy with a lovely woman in his hand. Alas, it would not be Jane Austen. It would be one of the loveliest and most enchanting ladies in the room; yet, for Tom Lefroy, these women bore no significance in comparison to Jane's charms.

He knew that had he taken the opportunity to ask Jane to be his partner for the first dance, he would have her in his hand. He also knew that she had seen him observing her from the upper window earlier in the evening. He had realised that she had been searching for him; her entire body language and gaze provided conclusive evidence of her desire to find him. Yet, for the love of his life, he could not find the courage to reveal himself and ask for her hand to dance. Instead, he had hid behind the curtain until the first dance was announced. He had seen Wisley take Jane's reluctant hand and it therefore seemed a safer option for Tom to depart and resume his brooding inside his uncle's library; his place of retreat since the Laverton trip. After all, his sole purpose in attending the ball had been to catch a glimpse of Jane Austen and to ensure that his feelings towards her were real, not simply fanciful thoughts.

And yet, Tom Lefroy could not endeavour to leave the party. Not before he spoke to Jane and confessed his feelings, his love, for her. Hence, he hastily approached a young lady in a beautiful white Rococo dress who had been idly standing alone. Being a London socialite, he knew that the lady had been secretly observing him, hoping that he would ask her to dance. Tom saw apparent admiration in the lady's eyes and, had it been a month ago, he would without hesitation, have began flirting with her. But now… with careful demeanour and extra propriety, he led the lady to the dance floor and bowed appropriately in front of her. No flirting, no imprudent touching. For his flirts, touches and heart were now dedicated only to Jane.

As the dancers performed a pair of lines, a leading lady commenced the dance. The remaining dancers, including Tom and his partner, followed her lead and glided along in accordance with the music. Surreptitiously, he stole glances towards Miss Austen who was dancing with Mr. Wisley. Tom's heart sank as he witnessed how gloomy and withered Jane looked. She danced without passion; without the prominent trait of Jane Austen he had blissfully observed in their discussions of literature, among other topics. The very trait he had come to love so intensely. During the dance, she had kept her head low and only managed to force a smile as she exchanged position with Wisley. It was obvious that Jane was not enjoying the dance, and Tom felt a pang of guilt muster within him.

The dance setting slowly shifted now and, by tradition, Tom had to exchange partner as well. This generated excitement within him as, although slowly, he was travelling closer to Jane. He saw how she was merely conducting her social obligation of dancing with a man she did not care for or wish to be with and Tom felt forlorn as he observed the light fading from Jane's fair countenance. And yet despite this, he also felt a surge of elation as he was confident that Jane Austen would not display such depressing expression had she experienced any enjoyment in dancing with Wisley. She obviously did not love Lady Gresham's nephew, which opened the door for the notion that she, instead, loved him: Tom Lefroy, the poor Irish lad. _But…does she?_ He still dreaded the answer, but he also knew he could no longer wait.

Determined, Tom dismissed his fear to make way for the emergence of a cheerful and carefree composure. The music led him one step behind her, and imminently it would be his turn to take her hand and lead her in the dance.

Perfectly timing his movement, he glided in front of his love. Flashing his charming leer, he grasped her hand, taking Jane by surprise. Her withering spirit instantly brightened and blossomed the way first flowers of Spring bloom under the early sun of May. Her dimly lit eyes suddenly sparkled in excitement and anticipation as she followed his lead through the dance. With overwhelming happiness, he felt her abundant gratitude radiating from within. Her shining spirit, beauty and charm encompassed him entirely.

Tom Lefroy would capture this in his mind forever; the image of their hands connected, his hand delicately resting on her waist and caressing her skin so tenderly as they united in the steps. Oh no, he would not forget this moment; the stars that adorned her dark eyes as she transformed from a wilted figure into a blossoming flower, full of hope and life. Turning and dancing down the row made him realise that her adoring eyes also emanated love. Love in its wholeness; enduring and honest.

They danced on the spot for an instant…or two. They exchanged position in accordance with the sweet melody of the regencial music. It was at that defining moment, one of the most precious moments in his life, that their gazes were fixed to each other, drilling into the deepest abyss of their souls. It was a common practice during the dance to converse with the dance partner, yet no words were uttered whatsoever between Jane Austen and Tom Lefroy. No words…yet their eyes asked questions, which although unexpressed, were understood; and demanded answers, which although undeclared, were received and comprehended by both of them to the fullest extent.

They loved each other. They both realised this truth with as much certainty as the knowledge that the sun always rises in the east. Unknowingly, they both felt a particular uneasiness with these new revelations and the inevitable consequences.

Unexpectedly for the pair, the dance and the poignant music ended. Tom and Jane remained fixed in their positions, both feeling awkward and failing to comprehend the consuming feelings within their hearts. He wanted, needed, to look into her reassuring eyes, but she had kept her head low instead. Hence, as tradition dictated, he bowed to the lady in white Rococo dress, smiled and congratulated her elegant steps. He turned to lead the lady away but stole a glance of Jane being taken by Wisley towards the opposite corner. Tom Lefroy hesitated and then, changing his direction, directed his dancing partner thitherwards Jane.

_Author's note:_

_Oh, I sincerely hope that I managed to capture the beauty of the dance moment. The best, most romantic, most soulful period dance scene I've ever seen. Of course, dances in 'Pride and Prejudice' and 'Sense and Sensibility' were gorgeously performed. The scene where Jo March and Laurie animatedly danced in 'Little Women' was also my favourite (not romantic really, but very touché). _

_But Tom and Jane's dance in 'Becoming Jane'… it was just – for lack of better word – magical…__the best period dance I've ever seen…No words spoken whatsoever… just eyes… and undeclared love._

_PS: Rococo dress refers to dresses of the 1700s, prior to the 1795 Regency era with empire waist line. Before Rococo, there was Baroque – but both Rococo and Baroque are very strict and tight compared to the flowing Grecian-like Regency dresses. Anne Hathaway always wore Regency dresses in this movie, and beautiful ones, that is!_


	9. Husband or Lover

**Becoming Jane: the Vignettes**

**By Icha**

**Rated: T**

_Summary: __Scenes of Becoming Jane. Can't stop loving it! Thanks to Rachel Kingston for the faithful beta! Chapter 9: Jane's POV of the dance. For those who have yet to see the movie: SPOILERS ahead. But I suggest you to watch it still, it worth it! And thanks for the read and reviews!_

**Chapter 9. ****Husband or Lover**

Jane Austen could hardly breathe. She was dancing with Tom Lefroy, the man of her dreams. She was still contemplating her good fortune; only minutes before she had been mourning his absence and tormenting her soul that he disliked her and was avoiding her.

And now she was utterly mesmerised by his presence! To her utmost surprise, he had swooped in front of her in his rich dark velvet coat and held her hand in such fashionable way. His leer…the same leer usually on display when he took pleasure in teasing her. His smile and presence had turned her withering spirit into a blossoming flower. She so desperately wanted to smile back at him, tease him and question his whereabouts hitherto. Yet his smile captivated her; she was paralysed, unable to utter even a single word.

Thus instead, she let him lead her in the dance. She let him touch her back so tenderly, caressing her skin delicately. She read his eyes; eyes that were declaring a thousands feelings, communicating a thousand thoughts. She allowed herself to respond in the same manner; their mutual love flowed between them.

She loved him. Yes, she loved him. Upon taking her hand, she experienced a joy like nothing before. When she gazed into his bright blue eyes, she felt a deep, relentless longing for him; the very same longing she had always felt the last few days. And, to her delight, Jane Austen realised that Thomas Lefroy returned her love. His love for her was earnest, was exceedingly apparent, in the way he led her in dance, caressed her hand and searched the depths of her soul to find the answers they had both been seeking.

Nonetheless, with gradual motion, the smile disappeared from his countenance and was replaced by a loving, yet solemn expression. Jane was then certain that Tom's love for her alarmed him in the same way that her love for him caused her sleepless nights. She stared at him directly in the eye and, with a piercing pain through her heart, realised that their love suffocated him. They were both afraid of their love and its consequences.

During the course of their dance she had not been able to articulate a word due to his charm and her love but now, she could not speak due to an overwhelming fear within her. What was going to happen to them? Should she endure the wait for his declaration of love whilst knowing that the entire society would oppose? She was sure she loved him yet she dreaded the consequences. Hence, as the music ended, she lowered her head in an attempt to dismiss the disturbing questions circulating her heart. She could feel Tom's gaze on her, begging her to return her eyes to him, but she dared not lift her head. Thus, she could not see that his eyes were fixed at her while he was bowing to his dancing partner. She lifted her head as Tom and his partner walked away. Jane covertly followed them with her eyes, only to be interrupted by Mr. Wisley's request to turn around the room.

And so Jane Austen once again found herself in the hand of the man she did not wish to be with. She fulfilled her duty beside Mr. Wisley, bowing to strangers upon introduction but caring for none of them. She was concentrating on mustering the strength to tame her heartbeat and ease her composure. None of Mr. Wisley's words were aiding her. She could not dismiss the coloration on her cheek; her countenance still flaming in red. About to force herself to respond to a comment directed at her, she heard a familiar voice from behind her which instantly calmed her tense posture.

'You danced with passion.'

_It's him! Oh dear God…did he not walk to another direction? How could he be behind __me? _The fire within Jane re-ignited upon hearing his voice. She had to keep her tone composed as she confided, 'No sensible women would demonstrate passion…if the purpose was to attract a husband.' She playfully tilted her head to one side and caught a glimpse of his smile.

'As opposed to a lover?' Tom Lefroy replied in a teasing yet calming tone, casting a glance at Mr. Wisley who was still occupied with his friends.

This question struck her. The harsh reality of her situation encompassed her mind; the conventions of society may prevent her from marrying the man she loved. Jane found herself unable to continue with such an innuendo. This was her first experience of true love and she knew not what to do with it. Literary discussions were exceedingly different from banters of love, and Jane Austen was a novice to love. Hence, she swallowed her nervousness and, after pausing, whispered,

'Rest easy Mr. Lefroy. I have no expectation on that account.'

Apparently, the young Mr. Lefroy sensed her apprehension. He immediately adjusted his manner and apologised. 'I did not mean to offend….all that… I –'

Jane found it harder to breath now. Agitated, she shook her head and muttered, 'No, no, no, of course not…' before hastily excusing herself under the pretense that she needed some fresh air. Ignoring the questioning glance from Mr. Wisley and the evident concern from John Warren, whom she met in the doorway, she filtered through the crowds towards the garden.

Jane Austen was unaware that Tom Lefroy had followed her but upon also encountering John, Tom had reluctantly retreated back to the ballroom. If she had dared to look back, she would have seen his expression of desperation. Desperation and forbidden love.

_Author's note:_

_I am forever grateful for RQS11 who posted the 'Husbands and Lovers' clip at the youtube __ and hence enabled me to viewed the scene many times during the writing of this section. Reviews, please!_


	10. ‘I am yours, heart and soul'

**Becoming Jane: the Vignettes**

**By Icha**

**Rated: T**

_Summary: __Scenes of Becoming Jane. Can't stop loving it! Thanks to Rachel Kingston for the faithful beta! Chapter 10: THE KISS! For those who have yet to see the movie: SPOILERS ahead. But I suggest you to watch it still, it worth it! And thanks for the read and reviews!_

**Chapter 10. 'I am yours, heart and soul.'**

Tom Lefroy waited anxiously, observing a private room in which Jane had reluctantly entered with Lady Gresham upon her request. Such a discreet conversation conducted at such a grand event could only mean one thing – her Ladyship inquired after an utmost important matter. What important matter could involve Jane Austen other than the courtship between Jane and the lady's nephew, Mr. Wisley?

The door opened and Jane exited the small room. Tom, who was positioned in the corridor of the first floor, was eager to follow her when he realised that he was not alone. Lucy Lefroy followed his gaze and began to speak.

'I do hope that Jane accepts Mr. Wisley's proposal of marriage soon. Ah, they are such a matching couple, are they not?'

These words stunned Tom. He had no idea that a marriage proposal had been made. A pain shuddered through his entire body; his mind was instantly filled with panic and turmoil. The notion of Lady Gresham forcing Jane into marrying Wisley was an abominable idea that made Tom revolted. _Wisley could never make her happy. What does he know of Jane's favourite poetry or what makes her laugh? He knows only of money, something that Jane views as subservient to love. _He snorted and watched as Jane disappeared into the garden. Mrs. Anne Lefroy responded to her daughter by adding, 'Hush, Lucy…hush…' of which Lucy retorted, 'Do you not think so?' Upon noticing the anguish etched on Tom's face, mother and daughter shared a knowing look, and glided away, leaving Tom to ponder his thoughts alone.

Wisley would not make Jane happy, he was very certain of that. But what if…what if Lady Gresham had forced Jane into consenting? Her appearance as she left the room had not been one of obstination. _What if she has to consent for the sake of her family? For money? What if I am to lose her?_

Unable to bear such thoughts, Tom tentatively followed Jane into the rose garden. He found her standing absent-mindedly by the pond, gazing into the distance. After a few reluctant moments, he approached and stood beside her. He cleared his throat to announce his presence but no words left his mouth. The girl that had captivated his heart said nothing either. He finally spoke.

'I….. have just learned of Wisley's proposal,' he decided to play safe. 'Congratulations.' He looked at her and saw the agony in her eyes. Indeed, Jane Austen was silently crying. A pang of sorrow hit his heart; he dropped his false countenance to declare his true feelings. 'How could you marry him? How could you, of all people, dispose of yourself without love?'

Jane stirred from her stupor. With tears running down her rosy cheeks, she whispered, 'How could I dispose of myself with it?' She slowly turned to face him; their eyes met. 'You are to leave tomorrow…'

Tom searched Jane's eyes and found nothing but the truth: she loved him dearly, as he loved her ardently. He had felt her silent affirmation of love during their dance but his reluctance to speak had prevented him from confirming this declaration. But now, looking into the dark eyes adorned with tears, he finally erased any doubt; he was certain that she loved him. Elated, he realised that he did not want any other woman but Jane Austen. He was preparing to speak when she slowly closed the space between them and kissed him.

The revelation that Jane kissed him first shocked Tom.Gathering his composure, he began to return her kiss…gently… tenderly. He savoured her sweet scent and the taste of her lips with gratitude…he was in eternal bliss. Yet, suddenly she stopped and innocently asked,

'Did I do it well?'

Again, Tom was stunned. He chuckled, softly stroked her cheek and replied, 'Yes. Very well.'

She smiled shyly. 'Oh, good. I have always wanted to do it well. Just once, to do it well.'

Tom could reply no more. He kissed Jane with joy and tears. As the passion between them began to escalate, some voices travelled from the main building. _Somebody is coming!_ Swiftly, Tom led his lady away from the pond towards a large tree, camouflaged by shadow. Panting with apprehension, they spotted several gentlemen walking along the cobble stone path into the garden, away from their hiding place. Tom waited for a moment before making sure that they were truly alone before he faced the love of his life once more, who was leaning on the tree, her face flustered. For safety, he led her several steps deeper into the darkness whilst hastily proclaiming,

'Jane…I have no money. I am entirely dependent on my pretentious, mean uncle for survival. But upon my words…' he held her passionately, '– I'm yours, Jane! I'm yours! Heart and soul!' He found himself sobbing as he continued, 'I love you, and I want only you!'

He found her half chuckling and half crying. 'When did we decide that?'

He chuckled as well. 'I do not know…' He was about to kiss her again when his ears caught voices in the distance. The gentlemen were back, but they would not steal his chance of expressing his love for her. Promptly, he moved Jane deeper into the darkness and resumed his sentence. 'But I do know that I want to be with you.' He kissed her again and found her ardently kissing him back, muttering, 'But what are we to do?'

Tom passionately cradled Jane's angelic face in his hands as he replied, 'What we must.'

-TBC-

_Author's note:_

_Ahhhh!!! The kiss! One of the best kisses I've ever seen on the silver screen! The precious expressions of Jane and Tom as they confessed their love to each other. Ahhhh!!! I want to see it again! Why in the world do they have to air the movie so late in the U.S.?! I can't have my DVD beforehand!_

_Please read and review, and thanks! Next: London._


	11. Sliding Down the Bannister

**Becoming Jane: the Vignettes**

**By Icha**

**Rated: T**

_Summary: __Scenes of Becoming Jane. Can't stop loving it! Thanks to Rachel Kingston for the faithful beta, and apologise for the whole month of absence. Chapter 11: London, and letters between Jane and Tom. For those who have yet to see the movie: SPOILERS ahead. But I suggest you to watch it still, it worth it! And thanks for the read and reviews!_

**Chapter 11. ****Sliding Down the Bannister **

From the window of the first floor corridor, Tom Lefroy saw the long-awaited carriage approaching Judge Langlois' grand house in Cork Street. Tingles of excitement spread through his nerves as the butler announced the arrival of his guests. This wave of adrenaline sent him running along the corridor and upon arriving at the top of the stairs, sliding down the banister with the spirit of a two-year old boy. To be exact, he was a twenty-year old lad who would set eyes upon the love of his life in a few minutes.

The love of his life was Jane Austen; a witty, gorgeous girl from Hampshire whom he had met last December when he visited his relatives in Ashe. And now, seven long months had passed since he first kissed her sweet cherry lips under the trees in the rose garden of Lady Gresham's manor. He had to return to London the exact day after the ball; the London court schedule and his study at Lincoln's Inn did not leave room for extended visit in Hampshire. It almost shattered his heart to leave Jane in Steventon and to no longer be able to exchange regular banters with her. The only consolation was that they had declared their love to each other and they both knew that these were not empty words.

The declaration had indeed been proven true for dozens of letters had been sent between the lovers throughout the past seven months. They had discussed many things: Tom's law school and works at the court, his friends in college, his trips to Bond Street, arts and theatres in the city, and 'how I wish I could show you around London'. Tom often ended his letter with 'I'm yours heart & soul' or something else to that effect, for he indeed had no room for any woman in his heart other than Jane Austen.

Always talkative, Jane discussed much about her creative writing; she often sent Tom pieces of her works, and Tom always took pleasure in providing significant comments along with his reply. Sometimes she talked of house-keeping, including killing pig and lamb for dinner (Mrs. Austen was apparently more confident that her little Jane was growing into a woman and surely was capable of handling house-keeping matters that Cassandra, who now often visited their older brothers James or Edward, usually was responsible for). Often, Jane talked about dinners she attended; including at Lady Gresham's manor where she reported that Mr. Wisley appeared to receive her blatant signals that she was uninterested in him. Jane also described the assemblies and parties she attended, with usual remarks of the merriment of the guests and how many dances she took part in. Inevitably, the line would then continue with 'I wish you were here Thomas, for no one but you ever danced so passionately with me.' She dared not to mention the kiss, but she was often spared from the hidden desire, for Tom repeatedly referred to the moment in his letters. And, after ruminating on the memory of the life-changing night they shared the sweet tender kiss, Jane Austen would close her letter with 'I am forever yours' or 'I am affectionately yours'.

And now, this end of August, the partner of the beautiful letter exchange (stored ardently by Tom inside his nightstand) would appear in front of him; life and passion illuminating from her soul. Upon reaching the bottom end of the banister, he landed perfectly with his boots firmly on the ground and positioned in front of the door as his uncle reprimanded 'Decorum!' The door opened: Countess Eliza de Feullide entered the room in all her splendour. Always assuming perfect etiquette in front of the aristocrats, Judge Langlois expanded his hand and declared, 'Welcome! Welcome…er…' to which Tom came to the rescue by gliding in front of his uncle, whispering 'Madame la Comtesse' and spun back on his heel into his original position and donned the appropriate serious expression for an official guest reception.

'Ah, welcome Madame la Comtesse to our humble abode…' Judge Langlois gentlemanly received his guest who was very elegant in her red Rococo dress. 'I am so glad that my nephew has invited you to our home, and that you received the invitation. Also, welcome to your friends, of course.' Madame la Comtesse nodded and briefly introduced 'her friends', i.e. Mr. Henry Austen and Miss Jane Austen, to the owner of the house. Countess de Feullide then replied with the same degree of decorum stating that she was exceedingly happy to stay in London for a few days _en route_ Kent where they were to visit her cousin (Jane and Henry's brother) Edward.

'Ah, indeed! Your stay is short; we have to get everything ready.' To his nephew, JudgeLanglois asked, 'Have you arranged amusements accordingly, Thomas?'

'Yes, Uncle. I have arranged some amusements for Madame la Comtesse and her guests, including a visit to the art market and the Haymarket Theatre.'

'Ah, excellent, excellent…' Benjamin Langlois only half-listened to his Irish nephew, for he was engaged in explaining the 'little humble bits' of his house to Madame la Comtesse and proclaimed that he would hold a decent dinner for the guests tonight. He did not notice, however, that a pair of brown eyes was brightened upon the words 'art' and 'theatre', for Jane Austen, the beholder of the eyes, was extremely passionate about art and theatres. Judge Langlois also did not realise that the young Miss Austen secretly exchanged enigmatic smiles and gaze with his nephew, nor that his nephew surreptitiously held her slender fingers as they ascended to the first floor.

_Author's note:_

_Many thanks to the readers who still follows this vignette. Indeed, the very reason I rather stayed away from the fan-fiction was not unrelated to Jane Austen, but because for the last month Rachel and I have been busy setting up and building our Becoming Jane Fansite or http becomingjane dot blogspot dot com, in case this link does not show. Please visit us and drop a hello or comment. Also, don't forget to review this one!_

_ Re: _ _Cork Street__. According to Jon Spence (Becoming Jane Austen, 2003) Benjamin Langlois (Tom's uncle) indeed lived in _ _Cork Street__ in _ _London__. Spence also deducted that Jane actually went to _ _London__ in August 1796, en route to _ _Kent__, to see Tom. _

_ Re: letters. Jane Austen's first and second surviving letters were from 9 and 16 January 1796. The third letter was in August 1796, thus leaving the gap of seven months without any letters. For a writing-addict like Austen, this is impossible (the explanation was that Cassandra took care to obliterate the letters upon Jane's death). So anyway, I took the liberty to 'create' Jane's letters to Tom from January to August 1796. By the way, the killing of pig and lamb referred to letter #11 (_ _November 17, 1798__). Also, in her letters, JA often ended her letter with 'I am affectionately yours' (e.g. Letter #2, _ _January 16, 1796__) and its variants. _


	12. A Dinner with Irony

**Becoming Jane: the Vignettes**

**By Icha**

**Rated: T**

_Summary: Scenes of Becoming Jane. Can't stop loving it! Thanks to Rachel Kingston for the lovely and supportive beta. Chapter 12: Dinner with Judge Langlois. For those who have yet to see the movie: SPOILERS ahead. But I suggest you to watch it still, it worth it! And thanks for the read and reviews!_

**Chapter 12. A Dinner with Irony**

Jane Austen fluffed her pale-green dress several times, lest the dress wrinkled and create a disagreeable image of herself in the eye of Benjamin Langlois. They had just arrived in London that afternoon, hence she had not yet determined her opinion of the Judge; surely he was a formidable man who was very generous to his poor nephew Tom Lefroy. Yet, despite Judge Langlois' charity to Tom, Jane still could not comprehend the older man's heart and valour. Hence, she made up her mind to do her best tonight and not to disappoint the man to whom Tom respected and highly depended upon.

A knock was heard at the door. Jane stood up and, after taking the final check, opened the door to find the maid of the house standing in front of her, proclaiming that the dinner would commence shortly. Jane nodded nervously and followed her thither the dining room where her brother Henry and cousin Eliza de Feullide were already waiting inside the lavishly decorated dining room, but Tom and his uncle had not yet arrived. Jane bit her lips fretfully and tried to dismiss the persistent thought that at that moment, Tom was talking, or even arguing, with his uncle about her. She was walking thither one of the seats when she heard a voice from behind,

'May I assist you at all, Miss?'

Turning to meet the tender and admiring gaze of Tom's blue eyes, Jane Austen lovingly smiled and replied politely, 'With pleasure, Mr. Lefroy.' She then allowed Tom to aid her in seating and let him 'accidentally' brush her arm gently as he whispered, 'The dress is very lovely Miss, but you are indeed charming already.' It was the very dress Jane wore as Tom kissed her for the first time; she had kept the dress the way a woman cherishes her wedding dress. Hence, Jane was very pleased that Tom seemed to recognise the dress and, of course, remembered their momentous event in the rose garden. She blushed and seated herself appropriately, hoping that Tom would sit next to her.

But the young lad apparently was rather aware of decorum that evening, for he positioned himself opposite Jane across the table and awaited his uncle's presence with the utmost charming manner. Judge Langlois entered the dining room moments after Jane was seated and, not unlike the court-room tradition, she mimicked the others who rose and greeted the owner of the house.

The dinner menu that evening was remarkably extravagant and mouth-watering: white soup for entrée, followed by creamy-rich mashed potatoes, Bouillabaisse, beef and roasted vegetable ragout, roast pork with apple sauce, spinach herb quiche, and, to Jane's surprise, _'stobhach gaelach'_ or Irish stew, Tom's favourite dish. Should the overly meticulous Lady Gresham have joined the dinner, her Ladyship would have to applaud the cook for his excellence.

Initially, most of the conversation took place between Judge Langlois and Madam la Comte de Feullide, for the latter was indeed well-versed in the world of French aristocrats, and the former was exceedingly fond of entertaining himself with the story of _la belle_ Paris. Jane, Henry and Tom remained silent for the majority of dinner; Tom only responded to his uncle's inquiries in the way a decent, well-mannered lad would answer a greater authority, displaying decorum and intelligence simultaneously and making the old judge proud of his nephew. Yet, when the topic encroached to Eliza's 'portable properties' that she managed to save in the wake of her late husband's beheading in France, Jane could not stand to stay silent. Without intending to insult Eliza whatsoever, she murmured 'Portable properties are good for poker table' to her silver cutlery and potatoes. Alas, Judge Langlois' ears were still sharp for his age.

'Do I detect irony?' The entire room froze as he swept his steel gaze towards Jane. 'I hope I am wrong… for irony is like a charcoal to a beautiful face.' He smiled as he spoke; the kind of court-smile that made everyone feel like the accused waiting to be sent to their death. This included Henry, for he chuckled uncomfortably and said, 'Indeed…' Detecting that the 'court-room' was his once again, the Judge tilted his head to Madam la Comte, aspiring to resume their interrupted conversation. He was very much mistaken.

'No.' Jane Austen suddenly blurted out. 'No…that is not irony… irony is the bringing together of contradictory truths and trying to find the common ground between them. It is an effort to bring out a new truth out of several truths.' Then, realising that she had spoken too much, Jane giggled nervously and diverted her attention to her _stobhach gaelach_.

In all his life, there was only one other person with enough audacity to confront the Judge; his very own nephew Tom Lefroy. And now, this young girl from Hampshire began challenging his ideas. _Why… little sly…_

'My cousin is a writer,' said Eliza de Feullide apologetically, in an attempt to stir the conversation to a safer topic and to calm the ambience.

'Indeed?' The Judge was even more surprised. 'A writer of what?'

Eliza directed the question to Jane, who replied, 'Novels.'

Benjamin Langlois blinked in disbelief. 'A young lady of the family...writing a novel?'

Tom decided to interfere this time. 'Yes, uncle,' he confirmed confidently. All this time, he had been cautiously observing the conversation between his secret lover and his uncle. Without any efforts to conceal his admiration towards the young Hampshire girl, he directed a brief glance towards Jane and added, 'And she excels in that.'

'Unbelievable! Do your parents allow you writing? Are you a woman of good family?'

'My parents, Sir, encouraged me to read numerous books,' Jane put down her fork and resumed, 'They also do not object my desire to write.'

Still astonished, Judge Langlois riposted, 'Indeed! And what future do you hope for as a female writer?' to which the young girl fell silent as she had no idea how she would sustain herself with her writing. She simply knew she must find a way, and she would cling to the idea like a vineyard creeper.

Detecting Jane's discomfort, Tom Lefroy came to the rescue. 'Women writers have potential longevity now for novel writing will bring them prosperity. In fact, tomorrow we will visit a lady that symbolises such example. A Mrs. Ann Radcliffe, whose husband I know from an acquaintance of mine.' As he voiced the words, he did not miss for the whole world, the overwhelming admiration and gratitude that was unmistakable in Jane's dark eyes. Ann Radcliffe was Jane's favourite author. Tom briefly flashed an assuring smile to her before he addressed his uncle once more. 'Mrs. Radcliffe is a very famous novelist of our time, well-known for her _'Mysteries of Udolpho',_ which has given her a total of £500 from the publisher alone.'

'Five hundred pounds!' Now, that was something new for the snobbish Judge.

Gaining more leverage, Tom continued, 'Yes, and for her next novel –' (to which Jane helped by saying _'The Italian'_ with brighter eyes and a smile), 'Mrs. Radcliffe will receive £800 from the publisher.'

'Over £1,000 in total!' exclaimed Judge Langlois in amazement. He looked at Jane with an entirely new perspective and smiled. 'It seems that the new era is upon us.' He reached for his abandoned fork and resumed, 'Well done… well done!'

Judge Langlois was pleased; the atmosphere was calm again and the guests were at once more relaxed and were able to enjoy the dinner which ended with delicious apple custard pie with vanilla ice cream. The rest of the evening passed without any incident; Jane Austen was able to restrain herself and be polite, though not submissive, during the remaining conversations, which contained mostly trivial subjects. However, the young girl did not manage to refrain herself from repeatedly glancing at Tom Lefroy, who despite his efforts to wear a polite and serious expression, always surreptitiously gazed back at her with utmost longing, admiration and desire.

_Author's note:_

_I love this scene, not only because Jane demonstrated her intelligence, but also because Tom was very supportive of her. Just remembering his admiring gaze upon Jane and her gratitude in return…. Ahhhh!!! L'amour…_

_I am sure that both Rachel and I missed a lot of details in the conversation here, because we saw the movie in March… almost four months ago. Yet, __I think the discussion (or rather, debate) between Jane and the Judge in the movie reflected her sometimes negative construction towards people of higher rank. Why, we know that Jane dedicated 'Emma' to the Prince Regent (George IV)… but what is also known by Austenites was that Jane actually mocked the Prince Regent many times in 'Emma', subtly and wittily, without the PR's knowing about it! I think subtlety was something that the older Jane learned in the process, but I can imagine her as a youngster verbally attacking anyone she opposed, including those of higher ranks._

_Re: food; I stole the recipes from Jane Austen Centre in U.K. Enjoy! Don't forget to read & review, please…the fiction I mean, not the recipe – dare I say they are fab! Thanks! _


	13. A Mrs Radcliffe

**Becoming Jane: the Vignettes**

**By Icha**

**Rated: T**

_Summary: Scenes of Becoming Jane. Can't stop loving it! Thanks to Rachel__ Kingston for the faithful beta. Chapter 13: Meeting Mrs. Radcliffe. For those who have yet to see the movie: SPOILERS ahead. But I suggest you to watch it still, it worth it! And thanks for the read and reviews!_

**Chapter 1****3. A Mrs. Radcliffe**

Mrs. Ann Radcliffe had just finished fixing her immaculate red dress when her maid proclaimed the arrival of her guests. Mr. Lefroy, whom Mrs. Radcliffe had never had the pleasure of meeting, was an acquaintance of her husband William. However, this particular Mr. Lefroy, who was apparently a lawyer, had stated his intention to bring a friend who was also an ardent admirer of her novels. As a famous writer, Mrs. Radcliffe was often obliged to meet her admirers. Some of them were professional writers, but many of them were mere teenagers who fancied her Gothic writing style and dreamed of living in a haunted castle where a handsome prince would rescue them from despair. Ann Radcliffe had less interest in meeting the second group of admirers, and when she learned that Mr. Lefroy's friend was a young girl, she had almost refused the meeting on the basis of her tight schedule. However, her intuition advised her to accept the request, for inexplicably she was interested in Mr. Lefroy's lady friend. Ann Radcliffe always trusted her intuition, and hence the meeting today.

Her maid was taking her leave to bring the guests upstairs when Mrs. Radcliffe changed her mind and walked down the stairs herself to welcome her visitors. She let her maid open the door and was treated with the pleasant scene of a young couple in their early twenties standing in front of her with the utmost of polite demeanours. The young man was indeed a handsome lad, with sparkling blue eyes and dark hair. The young lady, a sweet girl of dark animated eyes, could not conceal her excitement; Ann was certain that the girl would be dancing on her toes had decorum allowed her. In an instant, Ann developed a feeling of fondness towards the young lady. She smiled and introduced herself.

'Welcome. I am Mrs. Radcliffe, and I am glad to have you visiting my house.'

The young man said charmingly, 'I am Thomas Lefroy, Madam, and this is my dear friend from Hampshire who wishes to meet you.'

'Delighted to meet your acquaintance, Ma'am,' the lively and charming young lady curtseyed with enthusiasm. 'I am Jane Austen, and I express my utmost gratitude for your willingness to accept us into your home.'

Mrs. Radcliffe smiled and guided her guests to the first floor. She ordered the maid to provide them with some hot Darjeeling tea and scones and invited her husband to join their conversation. Soon, it was obvious that the gentlemen were mostly interested in speaking of law and publishing; whereas Miss Austen was exceptionally keen to talk to Ann more of her novels. To accommodate both of her guests, Ann invited Jane to another section of the living room and left William to handle Mr. Lefroy's interest in law.

However, as she and Miss Austen walked towards the chairs by the window sill, Ann caught sight of a glance exchanged between Miss Austen and her male friend. It was not a mere glance; it was one of comfort and support. The young lady was nervous and she was asking for support, of which she received in abundance from her friend. Ann then realised that the young Tom Lefroy intentionally conversed with William on the topic of law to give Miss Austen the opportunity to talk to her, and that the relationship between these two young people went far beyond friendship. Inexplicably, Ann was sharply attacked by a memory from the past. She had been here before… and it had not worked for her. Would it work for her new lady friend?

Miss Austen herself was oblivious to the sudden change in Mrs. Radcliffe's demeanour. Once seated, the young lady started to ramble about her admiration of Ann's novels; her amazement at the gothic scenes and her romanticism towards the scenes in the castle and forest. She quoted some of Ann's poems from her novels with amazing accuracy, and, upon taking out her own copy of _Mystery of Udolpho_, she discussed parts of the novel she loved the most. In short, Jane Austen was not a mere admirer, she was a writer herself; a junior writer maybe, but she had potentials nonetheless.

'Your novels… they are so vivid with mystery,' said Jane Austen. 'Yet, you live such a different lifestyle, Ma'am. So quiet and so content; seemingly without any mystery at all.'

Ann chuckled at the comment. _Such a young girl, so unspoilt of the true cruelty of the world…_

'So, you wish to be a writer? Of what do you wish to write?' Mrs. Radcliffe tactfully evaded the need to respond to the comment, to which Miss Austen smiled sheepishly with the rise of pink colour adorning her fair countenance as she attempted an affirmative reply, 'Of the heart.'

'Ah…' Ann nodded with understanding before she asked again, 'Do you know of it?'

The pink colour had not left young Jane's countenance as she admitted, 'Not all of it…'

'In time, you will,' Mrs. Radcliffe said rather mysteriously. 'If not… well, that's what imagination is for.' She reached for her cup of tea. 'Poor William… having a wife of literary reputation… nothing short of scandalous.'

Young Miss Austen seemed struck by her statement. 'Surely Ma'am, we can do both, live as a writer and as a wife?'

Ann Radcliffe cast her mysterious smile. 'If so, my dear Jane, it would be a fortune indeed.' Ignoring Jane's questioning look, she offered her more scones and diverted the conversation to the latest editing technique.

The visit ended within the hour, for Miss Austen and Mr. Lefroy had another engagement to attend that night. Ann Radcliffe took her guests to the stairs and watched as the two young people who, to her eyes, were evidently in love, walked down the stairs to continue their unpredictable journey. Jane stopped for a while to curtsey again; admiration was clear in her dark eyes. It was obvious that Miss Austen adored her, and Ann knew that the young girl wanted to pursue her life as a writer and also as a wife, very likely with Mr. Lefroy by her side. Yet, as she bade them farewell, Ann could not dismiss a premonition that the life of Miss Austen and Mr. Lefroy would not be as smooth as they longed for.

However, Ann Radcliffe was also certain that the young Miss Austen would not let any circumstances deter her from writing. Ann just hoped that the dashing Mr. Lefroy would always be there for her new friend. But if they were to be parted, although she wished them no pain, it might be for the better good. For any good writer must experience pain and heartache before they can channel their fullest potentials.

Not once did Ann Radcliffe think that this lively young lady before her would indeed experience such hardship, and that fifteen years later, this suffering would produce six of the finest novels in British literary history.

-TBC-

_Author's note:_

_There was no record that A__nn Radcliffe (1764-1823) ever met Jane Austen (1775-1817). However, I love the short interaction between Jane and Mrs. Radcliffe in 'Becoming Jane', for it provided us with a glance of the life of the famous gothic writer. In addition, I like Helen McCrory's role as Ann Radcliffe, particularly the way she intently watched Jane and Tom walking down the stairs as they left. It was as if she knew what would become of the young couple and she mourned them already._

_Next: walking up the stairs with Tom Lefroy ;-)_


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